Saturday, April 30, 2011

Life recently + Medsi test + financial matter :-p

Assalamualaikum and hallu2 everyone :)
agak lame aku tidak mengupdate blog...
agak bz lately...
balik keje je, online fb jap msg dgn si dia,
then terus berdating dgn selimut bantal and tilam...
arghhh sgt2 indah... ngeee :-p

lately aku struggle sikit utk stabilkan
certain financial aspect... byk tanggungan utk difikirkan...
so mmg direct keje la dari last week kot...
yg ade aku cuti pun jumaat laz week utk print slip...
then straight keje...

most of the time byk bende yg aku fikir,
especially sal medsi...
arini tadi aku ade ujian medsi...

MALAYSIAN EDUCATORS SELECTION INVENTORY
atau dlm bhsa melayu nye :
INVENTORI PEMILIHAN PENDIDIK MALAYSIA

satu test yg aku ase lebih kpd personaliti kite...
tricky questions gak la kdg2 tu...
but thankfully sume okeh2 jer...
after selesai MEDSI test td,
menumpang kete Nadzri utk pulang,...
aku,Pejo and Ciema duk menyinggah ke KFC
sesedap ase lunch dulu b4 balik...
then aku just g melepak jelah dgn cousin aku kat umah Ibu...
sarcastically she ask if I forget way to her house... hehehe

so thats all I can tell about normal life
anyone could have by being ME...

P/S: 
crossing my fingers for the next step... 
I.v ^_^

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Share The Pain And Sadness

What would you guys felt?...

when the person you loves the most in the whole world...
and means everything to you...

is sad... worried... tense... and upset?

And you felt like there is nothing you can do
to help … to ease their pain...

unless to help making them feel a little bit more better...
and not so hurtful... feel more relax and loosen up...

and yes... we might can't just “delete” that sadness from them...
but, sure... we can make it less...
we might be able to give some hopes
even when we can't take off that burden from them...
we can share it together with them right?

I mean, when we loves someone so much...
we were willing to do anything for them right?
So why don't we share that sadness together?
At least they won't have to deal with troubles alone...

what we would do for making that smile appear again?
Say things that will convince them... everything will be ok...
soon,everything will be fine and alright... ^_^
share the pain and troubles together...
so the world will feel lighter... (^_^”)

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Money Can't Buy Us Happiness :)

Baru2 ni aku ade terminat sorg artis ni...
die byk wat cover song by other artist la kan...
name die Maddi Jane... comel je org die...
and suare die mmg best... cara die bwk lagu sume...
ade satu lagu die yg mmg wat aku terasa nk menulis mlm ni...
(ke menaip ni? Erm whatever)

Price Tag> lagu asal oleh Jessie J...
tp bile Maddi nyanyi aku lg suke dgr...

why everyone is so obses?”
~Money Can't Buy Us Happiness~
and actually byk lg lagu die nyanyi aku suke giler dgr :)

ckp sal Money Can't Buy Us Happiness...
aku mmg cukup setuju dgn ayat tu...
so korg2 pun jgn la sesekali nk judge sgt kebahagiaan
terlalu berdasarkan financially k?
Coz sometime, you just wanna be happy and feel that happiness
without any costing it... right? And one more thing...
Money could never buy lurve... ^_^

List Outing S aku hahahaha demmit!!!

Assalamualaikum... and peace everyone :)

bersesuaian dgn tajuk diatas... aku nk story sal Outings
knpe ade “S”??? sbb aku da byk kali outing lately ^_^
x lekat2 dirumah, keje and outing... tu je keje aku :-p

lepas balik dari S.Alam aritu... aku byk lepak dekat kedai
outing pun selalunye dgn Nurul... and Nas
and my dear syg Cik Saif :)

7/4/2011 aritu kan dah kuar... karaoke sume...
(yg aku jumpe Saif jap tu)

but 14/4/2011 (khamis) keluar lg... hehehe
sekali seminggu kot... ayoooo :)
kitorg terjah Sunway... huhuhu
giler best... :) sbb have fun je kan...
dgn sesat2 jln bagai... sgt la lawak...
syg cik Saif x pat g mase tu sbb keje :-(
but we still have fun gak kan...



and yet... x puas gak merayau...
smlm 19/4/2011 (Selasa)
aku dgn Nurul g JPNS ambik sijil aku...
then kitorg duk merayap lagi...
memerap dlm Room 29 Greenbox selama 4 jam straight...
hahaha phewww boley ilang sore kot beb!!!
the sggh Giant and dptkan earphone utk Baby ACER aku...
earphone Merah and Baby ACER aku Maroon... sesuai la kot :)

mood: sgt2 hepi sbb dpt earphone and
jumpe lagu Sayangku ZARINA by Spin :) hahaha

jln2 carik mkn yg sgt2 best!!! hehehe

Saturday, April 16, 2011

Masterchef punye alkisah :)

Assalamualaikum dan salam sejahtera
salam satu Malaysia (skema slps tgk kptsn pilihanraya)
sori xde kena mengena...
aku dah merepek and lari tajuk ni... huhuhu

sbnrnye ting tong menonton AF9 yg kdg2 crap giler ni..
hnya sbb kamu la saye tgk Encik Saif... 
lau x, jgn hrplah...
tp ade gak la part2 yg ok sket an... 
cliché pun ade gak...

anyway, tgh2 dok menonton, tibe2 iklan...
keluar plak iklan Masterchef Malaysia pnya audition...
mesti bestie2 aku diluar sane yg bace 
dah gelak terguling2
since diorg tau sgt2 cik Zarina 
ni bkn jns yg lepak kt dapur...
even keje mesti hadap mknan je tetiap ari... 
heeeeee :)

tp bkn nk ckp apelah kan... 
just Masterchef mmg dah ubah
persepsi aku sgt2 terhadap dunia masakan ni...
aku mmg mnt dok tgk org masak2 ni...
tp dari kecik my late mum mmg x biasekan...
so selain desperate, kaki ni pyh na nak masuk melangkah kedapur...

tp sejak menonton Masterchef (oversea version)
x kisah la whether America or Australia...
aku jd fascinating and passionate about cooking...
x la smpai nk tukar profession kan...
tp just minat... lagipun... elok gak belajar2 kan... (wink*)
hehehe :-p

lgpn bile lg nk ase masakan sedap2 hasil dari air tgn sendiri right?
Nak jgk bg someone tu ase my cooking... 
:-) ngeh ngeh...
sgt gedik aku disitu (^_^”)

so,alternatifnye... saye akan mencube2 dirumah saje la
nk masuk dapur pro mcm tu mmg dah kna reject kt audition la kan...
tp sgt2 teringin lah...
so doakan lah dpt gak aku msk 
sesuatu yg interesting eh...
hahaha wish me luck on that... :) 

Monday, April 4, 2011

Abah, Maaf Kalau Diri Ni Terpaksa Pergi...

5/4/2011- Tuesday 1.40 am

time2 gini kebiasaannya aku mmg sdh tido
lelap diulit mimpi indah sesangat...
since tetiap mlm encik syg saye menghiasi mimpi...
(giler cheesy, ahaks)

but lately ade question mark...
(mimpi indah ke???)
aku da x dpt mimpi indah bebenor tu lagi...

kalo indah pun sbb dok mimpi encik Saif ajelah...
tp lain2... fikiran aku terganggu kot...
so aku cam disturb sket...

bygkan... aku mmg jenis kdg2 uh mengigau sket..
tp x ler serius sampai sleep walking...
paling teruk pun ckp2 time demam ke...
tp lately dah pndai mimpi smbil jln2...
and merepek dok ckp ape yg tersurat and tersirat di hati
which is agak menakutkan kalo terckp ape2 yg x sepatutnye
x pepasal je.. KANTOI!!!
gulp (^_^”) ngeh ngeh...

recently ketensionan aku telah menjadi sebak giler2...
kesedihan yg tersembunyi dlm aty...
aku bkn la rebel sgt pown...
cume aku letih sbb diorg ni x reti nk respect privacy life aku...
jadi idea utk meninggalkan rumah slps segala2 nya kat sini setel
agak mudah buat aku hujan...
x pepasal je mencurah2 and menitik2 air mata...
ape ke hal nyer sensitif dok melampau sgt ni???
tacink secara overacting lak...

yelah, dlm ketidak tidur an aku mlm ni...
aku bce2 la byk coretan2 lampau...
smpai la kat dedication utk supporters aku...
and dok terbace la tentang bpk aku...

tajuk yg setia membuat aku tacink...
peneman aku setiap pagi yg hujan...
dgn payung leaking utk g sekolah...
sggup ke, aku berpisah dgn die... ???
hanya kerana aku terasa fed up dgn yg lain2???

semudah itu ke?
Aku selalu kate “dlm hidup ni jgn mudah nak give up”
“jgn lari, kena berdepan dgn masalah”
bukan ke itu ape yg aku tgh buat skrg ni? Exactly that?
Semudah itu ke aku takut dgn rintangan dan halangan?

Selemah itu ke aku berdepan dgn kenyataan... ?

Jujurnya, aku dah lame keliru...
sejak arwah mak xde.. abah dah x mcm dulu...
jarang nak bercakap... x keluar...
mungkin die sedih and x leh terima...
plus ditinggalkan dgn anak pompuan...
nak2 lak anak pompuan tu mmg complicated giler cam aku...

but aku x tau la sebenarnye,
my dad ni x larat and x sehat bebetul...
atau semangat die yg x pulih2 lagi...
and aku x tau nk cure die g mana lagi da...

aku x la lari dari problem...
or takut...
aku x smpai hati sgt2...
kesian giler dgn bpk aku...
tapi... entahlah...
jiwa aku yg menangis ni?

Aku berbincang pnjg lebar dgn ibu ptg td...
slps di lecture cukop2
huhuhu (padan muke)
and turut meminta pndgn Zai and Ija...
begitu jgk dgn encik syg saye...

kebykan diorg mmg mintak supaya aku sabar
smpai result upu keluar je...
aku ckp... biarlah aku pk dulu...
entah ape yg mendorong aku senekad ni...
memandangkan aku ade lagi mase berfikir...
mmg aku take time...
cume keinginan utk keluar tu... yg mendorong
aku sgt2 nk setelkan umah ni...

tp di saat akan tiba mase perpisahan dgn abah tu?
Bagaimana nk aku tahan air mata ni dari berderai???
baru berfikir soal ni je aku dah nangis2 tiap2 mlm
smpai 2 ari berturut2 dah...

kenangan aku mase kecik2 lagi...
nak campak kemana?

Aku berlari ke kanan and kiri...
dikejar oleh abah jgn tergolek jatuh tgga...
pak lang ugut nak ikat aku kat kerusi...
(sbb lasak giler2, >umo=3/4 tahun gitu ler)
abah yg pujuk gerak dari kerusi sbb nk g beli ais krim...
kalau x memang aku freeze je kat kerusi tu sbb takut nk gerak...
nnt kena ikat... (skrg pun diorg nak ikat gitu lg ke???)

kena marah dgn my late mum...
abah yg pujuk and stop these tears from keep falling...
nak g beli sticker at Pekan Ahad mesti tarik abah...
pau singgit due... kalo minx kat my late mum mmg x pat...

its just I lost my hero...
right after I lost my mum...
feels like I lost both of them...
except last year he kinda start to talk...
but thats it... that was it... not more...
left pretty much everything...

setiap kali ambik report kad...
nobody pick mine...
like it use to be... or see my teacher
and ask how am I doing at school...
tp mungkin itu yg buat aku tabah and didorong rase
utk terus maju ke depan... and go further...

tp selama 5 tahun hati aku berada dlm sebak...
sedih and terluka...
smpai aku da x tau mcm mane nk hentikannya...
ase mcm aku da x mampu lagi...
and cukup la smpai disini...

beberapa ari yg lalu...
abah bg gmbr aku kecik2 yg die jumpe kt fail pe tah...
gmbr time 4/5 tahun kot...

tp syg... aku tgk gbr tu...
aku x kenal siapa bdk kecik tu...
knpe die mse kecik sweet sgt2???
at least muke serius la innocent...

tp tgk die skrg... da x tau siape die ni???
die dah berubah and bertukar jd mcm mane ni???
she is totally different person...
someone else... ke seseorg yg mmg dah jauh...
carried by emotion...

kalau betul aku nekad utk g jgk...
aku akan serahkan gmbr aku kecik2 tu pade abah...
sbb aku x nak die mengenang aku yg skrg...
biar die terus nmpk aku sbgai...
bdak kecik nakal and lasak tu...
anak manje abah!!!

Ya Allah...
tabahkan la hati aku...
abah, percayalah ini sume bukan niat yg disengajakan...
kalau lah mase boleh diundur...
and Nina mampu mengubah semuanya...
Nina x kan lukakan aty abah smpai cmni sekali...

walau smpai nafas terhenti...
abah x kan pernah keluar dari hati ni...
cuma abah...
org x perfect abah mcm yg semua org nak...

org ade minat org sendiri gak...
ini bukan diri org lg...
owg pun x tau org ni sape???
tolong la fhm anak bah sorg ni...

mungkin org x perfect mcm yg sume org dah plan...
dah rncg sejak org kecik...
tp semua ni mmg x mudah bg org abah...
sakit sgt2...
dari saat cadar putih itu ditarik...
owg ase hidup owg pun ditarik sekali...

saat tgk abah sedih berlinang air mata and x mampu
owg x pat nak wat pape walau ase hancur aty ni...
bile diorg bgtau abah bace surat yg owg bg tu
sampai menitik air mata...
owg da ase dose sgt2... tp sorg anak pompuan...
yg jurang dgn abah die...
and masih lost x tau nak save an keadaan...
itulah owg...

maafkan owg abah,
kalau owg terpaksa pergi jauh...
jauh dari sini...
jauh dari semua yg x fahami diri ni...
jauh dari semua yg menyakiti and melukai aty ni...

Nekad Giler... I AM OUT OF THIS HELL SOON!!!

Selepas kena lecture yg agak2
dok menyebalkan kepala otak aku...
aku da tau ape yg aku nk buat next...

bunyi mcm nekad sgt an...
but this time yes...
aku mmg da nekad lps pk abes2...

aku akan dok kemas2 umah ni smpai perfect clean
then siap je...
aku akan bg kata dua...
and rundingan...
berdepan dgn semua
yg selama ni aku x de kekuatan nk hadapi...

selepas je umah ni setel out...
aku yg akan out dari sini...
abah?? if diorg ni bwk abah balik jb...
aku x kan ikut...
and nak duk dgn family belah sini?
Kirim salam... NEVER!!!

even sesekali aku akan balik jumpe ibu...
mama... kwn2 sume...

balik ke Kelantan???
oh x lah sejauh tu...
sbb kat sane nnt susahkan diorg je lak...

kemana aku nk g?
Persoalan yg biarlah rahsia...
sbb aku ase biarlah aku sorg yg tau buat mase ni...
kalau citer lebih2 and dirg dpt tau...
diorg akan jejak aku... smpai jumpe...
aku dah puas sabar...
tp ni yg diorg nakkan???
fine...

about the house...
fine... itu mmg betul nk mara pun...
I mean umah die...
tp dgn sape aku berkwn,kmana aku g...
diorg x pyh nk sebok2 tau...
siap control2 and pasang spy...
x privacy la mcm tu...

ini dah sgt2 melampau ke tahap unacceptable kan???
kalau korg kna mcm aku pun
mesti korg sokong ini dah overboard sgt betul x???

I want my life back...
this is not the life that I want...
ni life utk aku yg diorg sume nak...
not me...

kali ni... diorg nk sgt kan...
nekad aku yg xde nak patah2 balik lagi kali ni...

after this aku mmg dah fix...
siap je kemas...
I am out of this HELL!!!

Interested lak dgn ayat ni...

Sebenarnya ni sume ialah 
ayat dlm satu novel...
x egt tajuk eh...
tp dah renovate2 ikut creative sendiri...

I am just an ordinary and normal girl...
typical human...
I can't promise you everythings gonna be perfect...

I know where our relationship is heading,
but I don't know how it is going to turn out...

In the future,
I can't promise I won't break your heart,
hurt you, or make u cry...
but, I will try my best not to...

We will have our ups and downs
like most normal couples does...

But, at the end of the day,
we know we need each other,
and we need it to be just us together,...

I can only promise you,
that I love you
and that gonna last forever,
whatever happen in the future,
let it be...
coz I still have you...
and you still have me... 

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Kampung Boy,Lat Sebuah Musical... story

KAMPUNG BOY LAT SEBUAH MUSICAL

a fantastic teater
with the list of actor and actress that I adored...
especially Atilia...
yg memegang watak Faizah dlm teater tu...
sgt2 minat die...

everything was so good... and cool...
I mean... the paintings...
the sound of music...
the acts...
the story...
and the funny parts...
they did very well... :)

mmg if I can say...
rugi sape2 x tgk...

for sure...
I adored Dato' Lat
since I was a little girl...
bce buku KG BOY
kat umah m.lang....
tgk kartun kt tv...
and this time dpt tgk kisah hidup die
and teater base on him...
sgt2 la teruja and bermakna rasenye...

and yg paling best...
I took pictures with one and only...
Dato' Lat himself...
best giler2 lah...
a history... :)